I was diagnosed with scoliosis 14 years ago this fall. I just turned 8 and my mom noticed that my back was a little crooked. I didn't think anything of it really and so when we went to the doctors I was sure that he would tell us that my mom was just being silly and that I was perfectly fine. So when he told us that I had scoliosis my first reaction was that there must be some mistake. My second reaction was how long does this take to go away. When the doctor responded that I will have scoliosis for the rest of my life it hit me hard. At 8 years old one week for a cold to go away seems like forever, so the rest of my life with scoliosis?? I couldn't even understand the concept.

I didn't tell anyone about my scoliosis, sure my mom told my relatives and teachers and such but it took me 4 years to willing tell someone about my back. For the first year when I had to wear the brace at school I had the teacher tell the class that I just got cold very easily and needed the brace for extra warmth. (Looking back I'm not sure how believable this story was) After that year I got a new brace that I only wore at night, but even then I was ashamed of my back. I never knew anyone who was going or had gone through what I was dealing with so I just hid it. I dreaded doctor's visits because then I had to really face the truth of my scoliosis when I would see the x-ray of my spine and hear the doctor talk about how my curve was getting worse and how I would eventually need surgery.

In 7th grade I learned that I would need to have the surgery that summer. Even though I still hadn't stopped growing my curve was progessing too rapidly to wait any longer. What bothered me most about the surgery was that I wouldn't be able to dance for a year and that all of my friends would have to know the truth about my back. Up until this point I still only had told one of my friends the truth. Although, the hump was beginning to be very noticable whenever someone asked me about it I just pretended I didn't know what they were talking about. (Lol I suppose you could say I perfected the art of denial).

July 10th 1997 I had my first spinal fusion surgery, it was scary but everything turned out fine. The first surgery at least forced me to confront the fact that I did have scoliosis and that it wasn't going away. But not being able to dance for a year was awful and what was even worse was that when I finally started again it was ten times harder! I was stiff and the flexibility in my back was compromised.

However, another blow came about 6 months after my surgery when the top part of the rod started protruding. The doctor was concerned and was considering going back in to remove the top part of the rod because he was afraid that it might break through the skin. The surgery would have been minor, but it would have required a hospital stay; something I was not too happy about.

But then just I was accepting this my next appointment the doctor said that my curve was progressing beyond where he had fused. Then spine begun to twist. Throughout high school my curve got worse and worse. By the time I was a senior the hump on my back was worse then before the first spinal fusion surgery!!

Finally my senior year of high school my mom and doctor convinced me that I should really have the surgery again. The truth was I was in denial about how bad my scoliosis had become again. So throughout my senior year while my friends were worrying about getting in to college and all the fun things that go on during your senior year, I was worrying about the surgery. I wasn't sure that if I would even be able to start college in the fall. Well once June came around and I went to see my doctor he hit me with harder news. He said that since the operation was going to be so detailed (they would have to go in take out the rods, unfuse the spine, refuse the spine, put in new rods, screws etc.) that the surgery would have to be in two parts. I would need the first surgery just so they could go in and loosen up the rods and such and for this they could just go into my side. Then in two weeks I would come back so they could complete the surgery. And since it was going to be soo complicated the doctor wouldn't be able to do the surgery until the following summer!!! I was outraged becauseI had been anticipating the surgery all year and now they wanted me to wait another year!

To be honest with you I went off to college not even sure if I would even go through with the surgery now, after all that I had been through. But in the end I went through with it that summer. Looking back it was kind of nice the way that I waited until after my first year of college to get the surgery. Most people when they start college they think well I have four years here so I have time to get involved and do the things I want. Well since I knew I was probably going to have the surgery that coming summer I was able to take advantage of all the things that I wasn't sure when I would be able to do again. My freshman year I was in a musical, choreographed and performed for the University dance troupe, had a job, studied abroad in Costa Rica, worked for Habitat for Humanity, and volunteered at a home for adults with severe disabilities along with finding some amazing friends whole loved me even if I had a lump on my back. I'm not sure I would have had the motivation to do everything I did that year if it wasn't for my scoliosis.

June 2, 2003, Two days after the end of my freshman year of college I went into the hospital. I'm not going to lie the second time was rough, much rougher than the first in fact. Because of the fact that the surgery was split into two parts I pretty much spent the majority of June in the hospital. The best advice I can give to anyone who is about to have surgery is to try to start walking and moving yourself about as soon as possible. It's painful but it helps you get out of the hospital faster and makes you feel better!

After recovery my back became stiff and I begun to have back pains. Fortunately up to this point I never had experienced back pain due to my scoliosis but after the surgery it was always there. Now I make sure I do yoga and pilates at least once a week, it keeps me loose and prevents back pains. I can still feel the rods in my back and everytime I get an x-ray the x-ray technician remarks "Wow! You sure have a lot of hardware in your back!" (And I'm serious I swear I can't even tell you how many times I heard that...and if any x-ray technicians are reading I don't really find that comment funny I'm not a home depot).

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